Fade To Black
by GacTheDestroyer
Summary: Tatsumi/Tsuzuki, Tsuzuki/Hisoka. Just a little gapfiller to quench my love for this anime. I twist it into a shounen ai story so this is a NO LIKE NO READ area. ...Hidden feelings, supressed feelings, painful feelings...


_"isn't it beautiful? These beast love the taste of human meat, poor little girl... once sees a Shinigami, she is failed to die"_

_"what's wrong Tsuzuki? you look hunt?"_

_it's my fault again._

Tsuzuki woke up, breathing heavily. All he remembered was darkness and voices. Taking his breath - his mind - his sanity, he became aware that he was on a strange bed.

"Are you awake Tsuzuki-san?" Tatsumi. Atleast he wasn't alone

"Tatsumi, where am i?" he asked softly.

"a hotel room, you doesn't need to worry about the cost. I paid your way"

The memories about last night swarmed suddenly over him, making his heart ache even more. Barely held his tears, he asked shakily, "what about the girl?"

"we escorted her home" Tatsumi explained with eyes full of concern.

_Once one sees a Shinigami, she is failed to die... _

Tsuzuki felt that he had reached his limit. A rough sob escaped his throat as he furiously flinging himself to the older man sat next to him.

"Tsu.. Tsuzuki-san?" Tatsumi was understandably shocked as Tsuzuki face buried in his chest. His shoulders shuddering with heavy sobs, and Tatsumi damn sure wasn't used to being cried on, especially to the man he had longed for.

"Another person died" Tsuzuki said between the sobs. "its my fault for getting so close to them"

Warily holding the man's shoulders, Tatsumi felt like Tsuzuki's pain stabbed at his own chest. "stop thinking like that. You didn't do anything wrong" he said softly. Tatsumi sighed in relief as Tsuzuki pulled away, his sobs was lessening.

"yeah, but.. but i,"

"stop crying, you're a man aren't you?"

"sorry, but.."

"just wipe all the worry from your mind and have a good rest" Tatsumi offered a smile. "what you need all this time is sleep" he pushed the lithe man backwards gently against the bed. Tsuzuki smiled back. "thank you" After pulled the cover over his friend, Tatsumi moved to leave only to be weakly pulled back by Tsuzuki's pale fingers.

"please don't go," The younger man pleaded, grasping tightly on to his outfit. The beautiful amethist eyes shining with tears. "please don't go and help me deal with this. Make it so the pain wasn't so piercing."

Tatsumi's silvery blue ones blinked questioningly as Tsuzuki wrapped his arms around his neck to pull him slightly closer. Faces only inches apart.

"please?"

"what? h..how?"

Then quickly and unexpectedly, Tsuzuki leaned forward another inch and pressing their lips together. Tatsumi took a sharp intake of breath as the man under him pressed himself tightly to him. Somehow it felt good, and he gave in to his first instinct, closing his eyes and submitting to the heavenly kiss. He felt Tsuzuki's arms coming up and his hands in Tatsumi's hair, tipping his head over gently to deepen the kiss. Tatsumi opened his mouth and sucked on Tsuzuki's bottom lip making him moan slightly into his mouth, and it was one of the greatest sounds Tatsumi had ever heard. Tsuzuki's tongue sneaked its way into his mouth and Tatsumi finally realized what he was doing. He pulled back, eyes wide to find Tsuzuki's eyes filled with lust and focused on him.

"Tsu.."

"I want to have you make love to me. I want you to fill the empty space i felt."

It took his breath away for a second. Tatsumi shook his head. He'd been always want to hear those words out of the man's mouth. But not like this. This was the man's pain talking.

"please Tatsumi, the pain is just too much" Tsuzuki pleaded, burying his face into his protector's neck. Tatsumi almost gave in when he heard that lonely sound in his beloved's voice. But no, he didn't want it like this. Tsuzuki will just get hurt even more. Hurting like him. Tsuzuki would never understand how painful it was to the older man because.. because he had fallen with someone else. Hisoka, His partner. He knew that Tsuzuki would prefer the boy to comfort him rather than Tatsumi here. Tsuzuki just couldn't think straight. And that was the most pain.

"Tsuzuki, i'm sorry i can't" He heard himself answer. He felt a sigh at his neck and started to worry that he'd make the wrong decision. It felt like he was in the middle of a thunderstorm.

"ah, it's ok Tatsumi, i'm sorry too" Tsuzuki murmured. Still in the same position. Tatsumi held him tighter when tsuzuki started to cry for the second time this night. The noise was breaking his heart all over again. He leaned, burying his face against the beautiful man's soft hair and whispering reassuring words. When the cry stopped, Tsuzuki was asleep in minutes. Gently he untangled himself from Tsuzuki hold and left the room, turning off the light on his way out. This is the end of his love line, he decided as the door closed behind him.

~the end


End file.
